the science of change
by holmesfreak1412
Summary: Shinichi and Shiho in the Hunger Games and beyond.


**Warning: This fic would be hard to understand if you are not familiar with The Hunger Games book/movie series. **

**…**

**the science of change**

**…**

**Oxidation**

She groans when she opens her eyes.

The number on the yellowed paper of the Capitol calendar blares red. Akemi has long since left the space on their shared bed and Shiho can hear the sizzle of oil from the kitchen.

She can smell eggs and bacons. Her sister must have worked extra hours in the factory to afford that. She probably has set aside money for a new dress too. She does that at least once a year, ever since Shiho turned twelve and Akemi started working.

Next year, there would be no need for a new dress. Next year, Shiho would no longer see tear-brimmed eyes on the other side of the breakfast table. Next year, she herself would earn enough from the lab to buy her sister a new work dress. The lab would be closed from the trainees now. They should spend this day with their families, their trainer had said. Shiho had not needed any training for a while now and had not considered herself his subordinate ever since the more tenured chemists had seen her potential. Regardless, she had adhered. Akemi would appreciate the company.

_I will not get reaped today, _she reassures herself before rising from the bed and picking up the new dress Akemi had hung by the closet door. The water in the tub is warm and she takes time to scrub herself clean. Akemi would prefer if she does not smell any chemicals on her hair when she combs it.

She goes downstairs feeling like a whole new human being and Akemi smiles in approval.

"You look beautiful, Shiho-chan."

All she offers is a weak smile as she sits down, listening as her sister prattles on about the mundane as she skirted over the details of why there were bacon and eggs on the table and why there was a new dress ready for her when she woke up. They laugh at the littlest things and for a moment, Shiho forgets. But this brief moment of happiness is merely a transition state for the chemical reaction that is bound to happen in this dreadful day. Akemi's smile falters when she looks at the time and Shiho wishes nothing more than to make her laugh again.

But some chemical reactions are forever irreversible.

"It's time."

Chemistry, after all, is the science of change.

….

…

Akemi screams when her name is called.

The escort calls her name once more, in a honeyed, excited voice as though she did not just utter a death sentence. Shiho knows enough about catalysts to foresee that the scream would soon evolve into a helpless whimper, into a desperate cry. Shiho is all she had left other than the portraits of their dead parents and now, she is being taken away too.

Shiho does none of the things she knows her sister would and climbs the stage with a careful façade of confidence she does not feel. She looks back at the crowd without catching Akemi's eyes.

The escort calls for the boy tribute and Shiho briefly closes her eyes in resigned acceptance when a boy who barely could reach her shoulders stumbles up the stage.

His freckles are much more apparent at his nervous smile. His grip is weak and his arm is shaking. Yet it is this handshake that made her knees almost buckle.

She hopes that for what it's worth, there will be painless poisons in the arena.

….

…

Three minutes is not long enough to say goodbye.

The tears threaten to fall but Akemi's anguished grief is enough for the both of them. Shiho tries to stand up straight, unwavering as she wraps her arms around Akemi's sobbing frame.

They hold each other, no sound other than Akemi's incoherent mumblings. The Peacekeeper knocks to signal the time limit and suddenly, there is determination in her sister's eyes.

"You're smart." She tells Shiho. "You can kill them all."

The last sentence makes Shiho realize that had Akemi been qualified for the Reaping too, she would have volunteered for Shiho without hesitation.

She would have killed for Shiho too.

"I will." She finds herself promising. "I will be back before you know it."

Akemi smiles once last time before burying herself in Shiho's chest once more.

She cannot leave Akemi behind with that but she has to.

She makes sure to leave her heart behind.

….

She is determined not to put a name on her district partner's face but her sharp mind that had memorized the entirety of the Periodic Table as a toddler registered it nonetheless.

One look at the twelve-year old Mitsuhiko and at her hands that never held anything lethal other than hydrofluoric acid and it is immediately clear to her that the female mentor has since lost all hope. District 3 would not have any winner this year. It is all in her eyes and the dismissive huff she does not bother hiding.

The male mentor however stares at her longer, as though he is trying to reconsider her. He is a stout man with a bald spot at the top of his head. Everywhere else where hair managed to grow is grey. She had seen him around the lab before and somehow, he had recognized her too.

"I know you." Hiroshi Agasa mutters, leaning closer to her. His eyes are kind. One can almost forget how he killed six tributes all at once. "The guys at the lab always talked about you. With all those that I have heard, I do not think it is fair to not give you a chance at this."

He nods approvingly, muttering to himself, as though cognizant of a secret she does not even know.

…

..

They watch the reapings

She observes every single one, from the richer Career districts down to the most insignificant coal mining children. In the field of observation, chances favor the prepared mind. She has learned during her days in the lab to be extremely cautious.

The pair from One and Two are the usual brutes, more brawn than brain. They acted like they won the lottery when their names are called, like The Hunger Games is some kind of a talent show. The long-haired boy from Two is particularly unsettling. Shiho realizes that she has to stay far, far away from him.

The rest of the districts are uneventful, including her own. While her expression did not betray anything of what she felt, she exuded nothing else that could work on her favor. For the second time, she sees Mitsuhiko struggle to climb up the stage and she suppresses the dark thought of him dying soon. All she can do is turn away.

All the time, she marks the tributes that she needs to avoid. She tries not to think of those tributes she also marked to be relatively easy to kill.

And then it is District 12's turn.

She watches as a series of unprecedented events unfold: the reaping of a girl who is at Mitsuhiko's age, a loud cry of protest as a girl Shiho's age volunteered. There is fear but also determination in her eyes. She does not seem to be related to the girl but judging from the looks they exchanged, they know each other well enough for the stunt to not be an act.

Shiho cannot help but think that had Shiho been reaped when she was twelve and Akemi was eighteen, she would have volunteered bravely just like this girl did.

She would be the star of this Games, Shiho thinks bitterly and she starts hating her for that.

She hates her a little less when the boy tribute from 12 is called and pure, unrestrained distress crosses her face when he climbs up the stage beside her.

"May I present to you, the tributes of District 12. Ran Mouri and Shinichi Kudo!"

…

…

She cannot join the Careers. There is no other tribute worthy enough to ally with. The pair from twelve may be a good option but she adamantly tells Agasa no.

"I work best when I am alone." She insists but the arena is not the lab, where geniuses like her can be left in solitary for better productivity. But she inflects enough resolve in her voice to shut down any arguments.

Young, _too-young, _Mitsuhiko avoids her eyes during dinner and her gut churns.

…

…

They find out that she is training as a biochemist.

That does not stop them from dressing her up in silver like the electronics her sister had to assemble for a living every day. It was measured, adjusted and tailored to fit her but never had she felt so drab and out of place in such expensive clothes.

"Oh! But shiny things are such an eye catcher!"

Shiho does not bother to resist telling the feeble-minded stylist that dressing like this had not made any sponsor look at District 3 for the past ten years.

…

…

She was right. Nobody had looked at them during the Parade.

She was by no means, unattractive. Most would describe her as beautiful. She hoped that she would have been visually appealing enough to take the attention from her horrible costume. Except, District 12 has clearly outdone themselves this year.

She could not take her eyes off them. It is the rapid oxidation of a material in the exothermic chemical process of combustion. It was just fire. It was not even real fire. And yet, like the mythical Prometheus stealing the fire of the gods, it made all the difference.

That night, she curls herself on the comfortable bed, feeling every bit like the pig being fattened for the slaughter house that she is.

…

…

Training starts the next day. There is no game plan.

The lunch at the Training Centre is a feast. She has never seen so much food in one table in her entire life. Her stomach churns, wincing as desserts of all kinds and colors line up. She feels like throwing up. She wishes she is back home, eating stewed chicken with her sister. She wishes she is back home, worrying about nothing more than an unsanitary laboratory. She wishes she is back home and not thinking about how she would prefer to kill her district partner so that he would not be murdered by any of the more sadistic tributes.

The boy is wary of her. She did not exactly make it a secret that she wants nothing to do with him.

They never talk about alliances, about training. He nods when he sees her. Nothing else.

….

The pair from Twelve has none of the boy's reservations against her though and on the second day of training, they approach her.

"We want to learn more about edible plants." The boy, Kudo, is seemingly the more assertive of the two. She has seen him around the Training center. He is quick, agile and very athletic. Judging from the look in his eyes when he talks her over, he has a good head on his shoulders too. "I saw you match all the plants in the test and how you did it really fast." There is a deliberate inflection of awe in his tone. He smiles. "Judging from the layout of the training centre, the arena will be most likely a jungle. Knowledge of food source will definitely be an advantage."

She is not so much of a fool to decline and dismiss them. And Kudo knows that. The Training phase is not the best time to make enemies. She teaches them the basics, enough for them to feel that they have learned something. In return, the boy gives her pointers on climbing a tree and the girl (who is surprisingly good with her fists) lets Shiho spar with her.

They do not seem to be so bad, she thinks, watching as the boy shows her how to throw a knife. They do not discuss an alliance but Shiho thinks she does not mind the thought as much as she did before.

They seem to like her and maybe, these new darlings of the capitol may be of use to her.

Shinichi smiles at her over lunch. She smiles back. She does not feel like vomiting anymore but something else flutters in her stomach. It definitely is not from her heart. She did leave it with Akemi after all.

…

…

She tries not to think of his lingering glances, the extra time he spends in the Survival Skills sections with her and his visible effort of including her in his little circle with Ran.

He is just making alliances, she reasons. In the end, the Games is still a TV show. Kudo seems to have what it takes to be a main character.

…

…

There is not much she can do to improve her training score.

She can match all the plants she can. She can tie the best ropes or fishing hooks. She can beat the record time for the quickest fire every created. But the gamemakers only ever respond to a piece of metal stabbing a dummy and no matter how much of a genius she is back in her district, she is never enough.

She receives a five.

Shinichi Kudo receives an eleven.

She does not know why she is gritting her teeth.

…

District 12's gameplan this year is of a girl who volunteered for a helpless child and an exceptionally skilled boy who has tricks hidden in his sleeves.

District 3 has no such flair, except that they seem to be trying much harder now in making her look presentable. The stylist has been replaced with someone even more unforgiving of her imperfections. But the dress he puts her into is decent enough. At least, she wouldn't have to force herself to laugh with the crowd if she ends up looking ridiculous.

"You're a pretty one." He tells her, dabbing her face with something she had only ever seen in smuggled fashion magazines. "That pretty face when cleaned up should get enough sponsors if you survive past the Bloodbath."

She does not feel like herself when she looks at the mirror. She does not feel like herself when she steps in her Interview.

But for what its worth, the new stylist knew what he was doing. For the first time during the entire games, Shiho was finally noticed. She has seen enough Interviews to know how the host would treat a relatively attractive tribute and in her stylist's very own eloquent way of putting it, she did clean up quite well.

"Shiho Miyano of District 3!"

She feigns confidence, sat up straight and tried to appear desirable because in her team's words, selling her smarts would not help in selling _her. _

The host asks for a boy from home. It is the only question she answers honestly.

She sees Kudo looking at her curiously when she returns to the Waiting area.

…

Ran gets asked the same question too because apparently, anyone who meets the Capitol's standards of beauty apparently qualifies for that.

"I don't think he has ever noticed." She responds bashfully. Shiho has seen enough of the girl who took everything so earnestly to know that it is not an act. "He always treated me as a friend. Just a friend."

"Tell you what…" The host drops his tone, appropriately shifting to a more somber one. "If you win this, I am sure he will come running to you."

"I don't think winning will help me."

"And why is that, may I ask?"

"Because…" She hesitates, seemingly debating on the merits of answering the question before finally settling into a decision. "…because he came here with me."

The crowd goes wild.

…

It is every bit of the tragedy that the Capitol would devour. The star-crossed lovers, the nation is dubbing them now. Sponsors will be lining up to them. The Gamemakers might be interested in keeping them alive to keep the show going. No matter how much Shiho would scrub herself clean to appear perfect, she cannot compete with that.

She wonders who she should credit for that stroke of genius. District 12 is not playing to survive. They are playing to win.

The night before the Games, she dreams of Akemi, apologies for a broken promise the only thing that can be heard on her lips.

…

"Don't go to the Cornucopia. Avoid the bloodbath. Run away as fast as you can from the action. Find shelter and a source of water. Water is your best friend."

It is a sound advice. And it is immediately apparent that Agasa knows what he is talking about when she emerges from the chute, finding herself face-to-face with what might be the place where she would meet her end. She listens to the countdown, feeling her entire body shake. Her heart is pumping and her eyes squinting from the sudden bright glare.

_10…9…8…_

She takes in her surroundings. Kudo was right. The arena is a jungle. No extreme weather conditions unlike the frozen tundra last year. A lot of wildlife and plantlife for consumption. Rocks too, if she could not get her hands on a weapon.

_7… 6…. 5…._

Of course, there are a lot of trees. She wishes she had paid more attention in fooling around with the neighborhood kids around District 3's woods when she was younger.

_4…3… 2…_

Her eyes catch Kudo's. He seems to be mouthing something.

_1…_

The moment the siren blares, Shiho starts running.

…

What not many people realized about the Games and what Agasa seems to have completely understood is that exposure to the elements kills much more than the blade of a fellow tribute.

Agasa may have been an eccentric but she finds herself consulting his wisdom every now and then. There are no rivers, streams or lakes. The eight canons had boomed. Eight dead and soon the other fifteen will be on the same objective as her.

Standing on the muddy ground she found while on the move, Shiho starts digging for water.

…

Who says intelligence does not sell?

…

There are three characters in a Hunger Games. The main characters: where the camera would be trained on the entire time. They are the ones to face all the trials and tribulations. The lovebirds from Twelve are this year's main characters. Darlings of the Capitol from the beginning, the Gamemakers would not want to end it so quickly.

Then there are the bad guys: those Career brutes, apparently the most obvious choice. Except, they probably do not even realize that they are the antagonist in this storyline.

And there are those like her, the side characters. Those who would lay low until the most opportune moment to strike. She knows how to hunt. She knows what can be eaten and not. She has water. She will survive until then.

….

Kudo reaches the muddy place where Shiho gets her water and starts digging too.

She stays hidden by the foliage, holding her breath as she watches the boy do exactly the same thing she had been doing in the past few days. He does not look dehydrated nor famished. A bag is slung on his shoulders. They are coated with blood.

A few steps back, Ran keeps watch as Kudo gets to work. The wicked sickle she is holding looks like an awkward addition to the innocence her sweet smile induces. She drinks from Kudo's hands, the perfect picture of a star crossed lovers in a difficult situation.

She finds it difficult to loathe them, even as she watches them set up camp while she conceals herself. In any other games, she would have cheered for them too. Ran saved the little girl in a way Shiho wishes she can save Akemi.

Any other game, if she is not in it.

Each time this pair would show the littlest of affection to one another hurts the sliver of chance she has of winning. Worse of all, it does not seem to be an act.

….

She does not show herself to them, despite having an inkling that they would not kill her.

There is no place for her in their storyline.

….

The cannon booms for young Mitsuhiko.

She tries not to make a sound as she mourns.

…

The star crossed lovers are on the move again and Shiho sighs in relief as she starts hunting for food again. The small frog she managed to trap tastes like the food from the gods when she brings it to her lips. She saves some of the meat for later. Only one out of ten animal life in the arena are edible. She knows that. Her district designed it after all.

She hopes against hope that the rest would just end up eating the wrong frog but that would not really make a good show.

….

The cannon booms again. This time around, for Ran. The arena is quiet when it happened. But the nation would likely be mortified for a day and then move on. That is what the Gamemakers are after. If there are adverse reactions, then they are doing something right.

Even main characters die.

….

She is surprised to find Kudo in the same hiding place she had been when they had their first encounter. He is half-dead, one leg turning purple already. Most likely District Two's swordsmanship.

She could kill him, feed him the nightlock berries she had reserved for something like this and end his suffering. But the way he greets her makes her realize that he has known she was there the whole time that night and yet spared her.

Her mind is screaming at her to kill him. Her district is definitely screaming at her to kill him. Akemi is probably screaming at her to kill him.

But she does not because one look at the wound and she knows she can still heal him.

….

Kudo survived the careers. Ran did not.

Even in the doors leading to death, fate does not let him forget that.

….

He wakes up much more whole than he was when she found him and he thanks her.

A limp may be all that is left to tell of his encounter with the careers but Kudo's eyes do not look so bright anymore.

They both lost a district partner but she merely lost o boy she barely even knew. Kudo may have just lost the love of his life.

He lets her see him mourn.

….

_"What a turn of events! Shinichi Kudo allies himself with the girl who nursed him back to health. Would she be able to heal his broken heart too?"_

….

They stay together. Allies, she tells herself. But Kudo never asked nor did she offer. There are no words.

All she knows is that it is against her best conscience to leave him be when he can barely wake up without screaming. He mutters Ran's name in his feverish slumber. He looks lost when his eyes are open. The only thing that seem to bring him back is her company and she does not completely understand why but she stays.

She tries not to think of how she left a twelve-year old boy to fend for himself because she does not think she can take it.

….

One way or another, they have to move. It has been two days since the cannon went off. If they have to be the source of Capitol entertainment, it may as well be something they can control.

Kudo is smart, extremely so but the self-assured boy from training has been replaced by the boy who second-guessed his every move.

"I'm not sure if it would work." he says, concluding the plan. He avoids her gaze. Shiho frowns.

Grief changes people and Kudo does not seem to be headed to the best path.

"It's a good plan." She assures him. Because grief should not change his intelligence and with that plan he just came up with, they would be able to destroy the Careers' supplies.

…

They learn to trust each other and they use each other's skills to execute the plan.

They succeed.

Killing people is success in the Games.

…

The Gamemakers reduces the food supply to one of out of a hundred.

A reminder why the Games is called the Hunger Games.

…..

Eight remaining. Alliances normally break at this point. The tributes go down one by one every passing day. The Careers are reduced to half of their original number. Shiho's hands are by no means bloodless by now. She knows she can kill again if she has too.

But Kudo does not say anything about breaking the alliance. Instead, his gazes linger, his touches more frequent and he starts saying things that confuse and make something flutter from her chest. She chalks it up to hunger.

He tells him about Twelve and soccer and Sherlock Holmes. He starts telling her about Ran before he stops himself.

She is glad he does.

Their stomachs rumble and their knees are weaker. Kudo can barely hold his sword. Shiho can no longer see the difference between nightlock and something she can eat without dying.

Perhaps, this lightheadedness contributed to the eventual lapse of judgement because one moment, they are just talking by the fire about their homes and the next, they are kissing.

Something from overhead whistles and a small, white parachute descends.

_Continue to do what you are doing – _says the message signed by her mentor_. _There is a triumphant look in Kudo's face when she opens the canister from the sponsor. The bread would last them for a day or two. He smiles at her. She looks away. She does not want him to see her confusion.

It is a game, she realizes, watching Kudo as he quickly eats up his share. This is one of the few things he has not hesitated on. Somehow, Shinichi Kudo is not done playing the star-crossed lover act yet.

She is not sure why she is disappointed.

….

They write a romance book in each deliberate move that they do. She wonders if anyone else has seen through it. She wonders if Akemi sees through it. When her sister mentioned that she should get a boyfriend, Shiho is pretty certain that this is not what she meant.

It continues to rain parachutes.

….

Three more cannons. Five left.

The romance can only go for so long. This will always end in tragedy.

She leaves without saying goodbye, without looking back. He sleeps on peacefully, quiet as a mouse. She can kill him now but she does not.

He does not have as much nightmares anymore.

….

She is starving again. Kudo must be too. There does not seem to be anything edible left in the arena anymore.

The Gamemakers announce a Feast in the Cornucopia. A bag for each district. Five left. They all have something they all need.

The Hunger Games would not be anything if there is no showdown for food.

….

The showdown is essentially a riot. Ran's death is avenged when District Two falls at Kudo's sword. She kills a girl with a rock. Somehow, despite their broken alliance, they fight back to back.

He saves her life twice within the whole battle and she curses him because that means she can no longer kill him when it comes to that.

The next thing she knows, there is only the two of them left.

In the aftermath, they stare at each other, breathing heavily and not saying a word.

It is a long time before one of them speaks. The sun is rising again. The long night is over and the Capitol wants to see this showdown in the best possible light. She wants to laugh at the irony. Somehow and somewhere, she became one of the main character of this Games.

She wishes she can see the sunrise back home. She has not appreciated it enough. But dying like this, right now, does not seem too bad too.

She pulls the nightlock berries she had kept all this time from her pocket. Kudo's eyes dawn with realization and she explains. "You deserve it."

In a flash, there is hand on her wrist. Kudo is quick and in a second, half of the berries are in his hands too.

"If you die, I die." He proclaims and for a moment, she swears she can hear some truth on it. He smiles bitterly but there is determination in his eyes. "Tell me when you're ready."

….

_"Stop!"_

…

_"Ladies and gentlemen. May I present the winners of the Seventy Fourth Annual Hunger Games."_

…

The hovercraft picks them up.

Shiho is not sure what just happened.

…

Somehow, she goes through the motions for the Victory Interview. She smiles at the cameras. Her dress matches Kudo's suit. They hold hands the entire time.

The host asks them about the turn in their relationship from enemies to allies to lovers and Kudo, in all his eloquence is the one that answers.

"You can't fight chemistry when it happens."

She sees young Mitsuhiko's death for the first time. She sees Ran's demise played back for the Capitol's entertainment. She cannot turn away no matter how much she wants to.

The host asks Kudo about Ran, clearly trying to put some drama between. Kudo does not rise to the bait and he takes the question as an opportunity for a eulogy.

"Ran will always be a dear friend." He says. He does not say anything about her love for him. He does not say anything about his love for her. What he says is of a regret that a young girl can no longer see the sunrise just because she had to go to the Games.

It is a reminder of everything wrong about the system.

But he is a victor and the cameras could not turn away even if they want to.

…

They are both crowned victors, the first of their kind in more than seven decades.

The President smiles, comments on the redness of her hair and congratulates her with a whisper. His eyes flash dangerously. Shiho swallows her fear as she smiles back.

She does not feel like a winner.

…

On the train ride home, Shiho shrugs his hand. He looks at the space between them for one moment before he stares back at the window.

"So what happens when we get back?" he asks quietly.

He is from Twelve. She is from Three. They most likely would only see each other once they are mentors. They do not have to act the entire year. "I guess we try to forget and remember only when we have to."

Something she cannot decipher crosses Kudo's face and Shiho looks away again. She finds herself doing that more frequently these days. "I don't want to forget." He says. She does not want to know what he means by that.

Chemistry states that the more energy there is to a bond, the harder it is to break.

But no bonds would last when there is an imbalance.

"I meant what I said back in the interview." He continues, still staring at the window. He sighs. "You can't fight chemistry in the same way as you cannot force it."

….

She goes home.

She runs into Akemi's arms.

She cries.

She is not sure who it is she is mourning but that night, she finds herself clawing at her face until there are marks on it. She dreams of death. Of poor Mitsuhiko she left behind. Of Ran whose memory she is betraying by kissing the man she loved. Of Shinichi Kudo who she just wants to forget but could not.

She does not regret killing any of those people whose blood she can still taste in her mouth.

She regrets that she is not the one who died instead.

**(TBC)**


End file.
